morbidrequiem (morbidrequiem) wrote,

Nothing Simple...

Its funny how many times I have found myself at this crossroads in regards to the people I love. I am questing myself yet again when it comes to Danny. Not that I don’t love him anymore or that I want to give up on him. But I think its time I took the high road and wait and watch for him to mature and see which road he decides to take in life. This does not mean however that I am going to be putting my life on hold mind you. I will still live as I choose to live and should relationships occur during that period of time the so mote it be. But I can’t sit here anymore hoping and thinking that I am gonna wake up one morning to find him completely changed and understanding of my philosophies…that would be naïve and presumptuous and I refuse to be either. So I will walk my path alone yet again but not completely out of his sight. Stress abounds for me at the moment beyond my normal lamenting about the utter complexities and oddities of my social and “love” life. Work is better since my hours have been shifter about so that I am more of a morning shift person but money is in no way shape or form getting better for me. I am actually sitting in a mildly deep hole right now and it may take my next few checks to dig my way out. But to be honest when isn’t the average person stressed out of their minds of a daily basis, right? I really just want a break from all of it…all of this surrounding me at the moment. Just a short one…maybe for about a month or so. I would really like to move out to Arizona for a short while just for a complete change of scenery and it would be fun to live in a new place for at least a short amount of time. I really want to go and stay in the Cherokee Nation for a while and learn a little bit of my family history since I know so little. This, however, is all very much beyond the point but that’s ok. Well for now I think I am going to end this entry…I will be putting in another one very soon so stay toned LJ Fans.
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